Week 21
Day 1
New roomie! It's the piano player from Argentina. He's a cleanliness stickler so there might be some problems. As you all know, I am a slob. A self hygiene conscious slob, but a slob nonetheless.
And I GET BOTTOM BUNK NOW! For 5 weeks! I can actually sit up in bed! WOOOHOOOO!!
You see what ship life does to you. It takes away so many simple basic things that one rejoices for the absolutely absurd. And necessary. Never thought you'd see a grown man celebrate being able to sit up in bed now did you?
Oh and something fantastical and amazing happened a day ago which has severe repercussions affecting today and the days ahead. On the ship there is a sanitation and health risk level or whatever called the OPP level. Normally on level 1, everything is fine and dandy. But recently some crew have contracted some gastro whatchamacallit (whoah this word actually exists in spell check) disease and once that number of infected crew got above 1% of the entire crew they move to OPP 2.
The horrendous part about this is that all crew food areas and lounge areas are in a total shutdown. The bars are closed, even the library is closed. We are restricted from the guest buffet, I'm guessing no using the guest gym either, and worst of all the staff mess is closed and the crew mess, which has the worser food, is the only thing left open. And there is no self service anymore. Everything gets handed to me by someone - my plate, my utensils, my food, my cup, my drink.
As bad as that sounds, it cannot compare to the fact that there will no longer be anymore coffee available 24/7 because of the whole no touchy feely anything policy in this situation.
This is going to be a ridiculous week.
Our previous bandmaster who just left us told us to stock up on dry foods. I think I'm going to take his advice. This is a nightmare.
Day 2
The food in the crew mess has a magical way of making me lose my appetite. I take a nice big plate of food because I'm hungry and half way through I just can't have anymore. Eugh. But that just means I'll be hungry again later.
Today also marked a second pipe failure in a week. There was a huge pipe burst last week and today apparently something else happened and crew cabins are getting their carpets completely drenched. This does not bode well.
I guess it makes sense when you think that this ship in particular is on it's very last legs of life before major overhaul. The dry dock begins january, so if you think about it that way it is the time where everything needs to be fixed. I guess when I get back for my second contract everything should be nice and sparkly. I hope.
Today also marks the first time I've actually run out of towels in my room. Had to ask for it. But you see again what ship life does to you. Simply asking for towels becomes such an annoyance because I'm so used to having them replaced regularly anyway.
I wonder if eventually I'll lose what it means to be human living on a ship.
Day 3
It seems the emergency health risk nonsense has been lifted. I got my own food at the staff mess today. I hope that this wasn't just a fluke.
Indeed it wasn't a fluke. Thank God that the ordeal is over.
We played some jazz today for the first time in the cafe. It's a very tight setting. Really tight for space but because it isn't just on the way to the dining room the people that were there actually wanted to listen instead of just passing through to their meal. So we got a good response. And I must say the two new members of the orchestra are an absolute joy to play with. Particularly the piano player. He's an older guy from Argentina but man does he know his stuff. Our previous piano player was not a jazz pianist by any means so playing jazz with someone who knows what to do is very refreshing. I think I'm going to enjoy my last 5 weeks on board this ship. Sadly he isn't here to stay for my second contract. Hopefully we'll get someone equally good, or better. As a rhythmist, playing with someone who has great rhythm makes me explore even better rhythm. What a joy it is to play tonight. Some of the best fun I've had in a while.
Day 4
I just discovered a crack in my 20" cymbal today. My heart has completely sunk. That is a rather beautiful cymbal that I paid for. And now it's cracked. And it's not even 6 months! OUCH!
I don't know if it's cracked because of my excessive abuse or because of mishandling by the tech team when they reset the stage every night. I think starting tomorrow I'm going to tear down my own cymbals every night just to be sure. Ugh. This is not a good feeling. I hate it when I crack cymbals. Especially really nice ones.
Day 5
Today was quite a spectacular day.
Mid show during the entertainer I busted a hole clean through my bass drum head. Yeap that's right, I punched a big ass hole right through the toughest head on the kit. This is only the second time this has happened to me, but the very first this has happened during a gig. And the thing is that it wasn't my own gig because if it was I would've just stopped the show mid way and replaced it but it was a guest entertainer show and the songs just keep going.
So round about half way through I bashed my beater and it lodged itself inside the head. At first I thought it was a simple problem with the pedal - I've had pedals that have gotten stuck before - but then I noticed that it was a much larger problem. Me being the professional that I am found ingenious ways to compensate. Sure it wasn't the same - our sound guy noticed a significant plunge in actual volume from the bass drum - but I made the best of it because as a famous person once said, 'The show must go on'.
The funny part was that our entertainer noticed the plunge in the bottom end of the rhythm too and he turned around to ask me for more but I couldn't give him any more. I couldn't really tell him what was going on mid song so I just shrugged.
Like I said, I've never had that happen to me mid show before. It was absolutely spectacular. The broken head is now hanging in my cabin as a symbol of awesomeness.
Day 6
Once again it's that magical sea day. They made us do walkdowns today which is still very demeaning in my point of view. It's like a parade of the monkeys. I'm sure if you're a guest on a cruise ship you've never seen it from that point of view. So let me take this opportunity to enlighten you.
What you see are a bunch of happy smiling crew members who walk around you, some perhaps giving you high fives, waving and clapping and then eventually ending up on stage so that you can say a big thank you to the crew. It's appreciating the crew isn't it?
Well, the crew have to take a bunch of their time from a usually busy day to spend 15 minutes parading themselves in front of you, forcing a smile and forcing a wave like a bunch of show monkeys, getting our picture taken from all angels only to receive a ripple of applause from whoever happened to be sunbathing at the time. Some of us have things to do, and some of us have sleep to catch up on. But we are forced to take a chunk out of the day and waste the time in front of guests who think we're having a blast doing this.
So there you go. If you're ever on a ship leave a comment saying that they should stop crew walkdowns because that's a bigger sign of appreciation from a guest by letting the crew not waste their time instead of a pitiful round of clapping.
This PSA was brought to you by reality.
Day 7
As part of the refurbishing of the ship they are installing new mattresses for all crew cabins. Well, I say 'they' but in reality we had to lug our own damn mattresses from our cabin out to where the stash was, lug the new one back like a clumsy ogre and then proceed to injure ourselves trying to put in a mattress that is clearly too big for the space allotted. I'm very willing to be stuck with my old one rather than do all that unnecessary labour.
Also, the new mattresses are a lot thicker than the old ones. Now when you're at home with a ceiling that's at least a couple of feet above your head this is all nice and good but when you're in a bunk bed that has almost no headroom (top bunk no sit up remember?) a taller mattress isn't exactly a better one. Thankfully I'm on the bottom bunk now. Even so, if I sit upright my hair will brush against the top bunk. I can only imagine how much less space my roomie has now.
Torture. Disguised as a blessing. I never knew cruises were so evil.
Thoughts from the week?
I haven't been in much deep thought. I've been slightly bitter this week I suppose. Not in a really deep and depressing, but just slightly bitter that some good things have come to an end.
But don't all good things come to an end? But that's only true because the best things haven't really started yet. Go chew on that thought for a while.
See you next week.
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